YOUR KIDS ARE SCREWED

Life in Colonial America had plenty of downsides – no indoor plumbing, lots of chores, rampant illnesses. But to 9-year-old Andrew Bensonoff, the worst part had to have been the lack of technology.

“These days, you can e-mail or talk on the phone if someone is far from you,” he wrote for a class assignment on the 10 worst aspects of colonial life. “If I lived in colonial days, I’d have to send a letter.”

“I’ll take rampant illness, but I’m NOT sending a letter, damn it.”

That first quote was straight from an article in the Tampa Tribune (which you can read by clicking here. I make a lot of stuff up, like that second quote, but even I couldn’t pop out a gem like that.).

According to the article, the kid goes on to say he hates writing and couldn’t wait to get a computer. He’s in fourth grade; he hasn’t even been writing long enough to hate it. It’s not that I’m totally against kids using computers in school. Until computers turn on us, wipe us out, and eventually start their own race (see also: robot uprising), we need to know how to use them. Not to mention, as the article goes on to state, they do make note taking (/updating Facebook/Twittering/playing games/wasting time/instant messaging…does anyone even do that anymore?) easier.

I guess it just kind of bums me out that some schools are requiring them as early as fourth grade. Kids are constantly bombarded by some form of technology so it’d be nice for them to realize it doesn’t have to infiltrate all facets of their lives.

More realistically, there’s probably some unconscious bitterness seeping out because nine-year-olds can out-computer me.

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